I am the greatest Vegas showman you will ever meet.

Archive for December, 2009

Jack Satin’s Top 10 Holiday Gift List

I’ve been getting a lot of requests from people asking what I want this holiday season.  I guess they feel a need to pay homage to the vocal gifts I’ve bestowed upon them in the course of this past year.  So, here’s my wish list.  And for those of you with an aspiring Jack Satin in your life, now you know exactly what to get them.

Happy Holidays,

-Jack Satin

1.  Cadillac Convertible – Nat Cole, Ray Charles, Muddy Waters, President Gerald Ford, Clark Gabel, Bruce Lee and Elvis…  A real man’s car, for a man of style, who likes to cruise the strip with the top down, to see and be seen… bring a coat, Vegas is chilly this time of year.

2. Elvis belt buckle watch – A timepiece like this never goes out of fashion.  One could be buried with a collector’s item such as this.

3.  Piano with built in “Music Man” playerMusicians are flakey and carry a ton of baggage.  Self-reliance is the cornerstone to success.

4.  Cutty Sark Gift Bag – Nothing says “Holiday Spirit” like Scotch named after a clipper ship that roamed the high seas.

5.  Karaoke Machine – Guaranteed to turn any holiday office party into a work of art.  And if you film the performances, you can use the footage to blackmail coworkers in 2010.

6.  First Class Ticket to Waikiki – Don Ho calls this magical place home for a reason.

7.  Switchblade comb – Without words, it says a lot about the man that carries one of these bad boys – perfect stocking stuffer.  Fashion can be dangerous.

8.  Bengal Tiger – Why should my Vegas magician friends get to have all the fun with this loyal companion?

9.  Box Set of Bing Crosby – Lock yourself in a room for five years with this gift and you just might get to know the true meaning of rhythmic intensity.

10. Mr. Microphone – Helped many a man become the life of the party and you won’t blow yourself up in the process.


Jack Satin’s bizarre Christmas Albums

I was in the mood for some new holiday music but didn’t want the standard versions everyone plays over and over…  On my hunt for rare sonic gems, I’ve come across these striking album covers.  I can’t vouch for the music or recording quality…  If you know anything, I’d sure like to hear the story behind them.

This looks like trouble.


If you trust the Colonel with chicken do you trust him with music?


This is what too much eggnog will do.


Is it just me or does it look like the rain deer is about to cry?


I had a dream about this girl last night and she wanted me.


Can robots really feel the warmth of a fire?


Where do I get a jacket like this?


There’s usually something very wrong when everyone is having this much fun.


Is it me or does this Santa look like he’s on something besides Moog music?


Something about his smile, just a little forced.  Reminds me, I’m due for teeth whitening.


They just can’t get away with having alcohol in the bottom right corner like they used to.


Which one is the mom?


I’ve been wondering what the original uncut version of Afroman’s A Colt 45 Christmas sounds like.

Jamie Cullum – Please Don’t Stop the Music

I was introduced to singer/songwriter/piano man extraordinaire Jamie Cullum a few years back.  It was apparent this young talent had come into his own and was shooting for the stars.  Although he’s gained a sizeable following around the rest of the World, in the good old US of A he’s not as celebrated as he should be.  Just maybe his latest album “The Pursuit” will change that.  So, here’s some quick Cullum info for those interested, or those that like to arm themselves with music trivia to dazzle the ladies at swanky cocktail parties.

  • The biggest selling British jazz artist of all time
  • Hardly the traditional jazz musician – he’s covered Radiohead, Pharrell, Rihanna, The Doves…
  • His latest album  “The Pursuit” starts with a track featuring the Count Basie Orchestra recorded live at Tony Bennett’s studio in New York and ends with a dance track and a jazz standard combined with trip-hop beats
  • In recording “The Persuit” members of Beck’s band joined the sessions as well as the horn section featured on Michael Jackson’s Thriller
  • Collaborated with director and jazz man Clint Eastwood on the film Gran Torino
  • Has been named the Billy Joel of his generation

Jamie Cullum quotes-

“In life, we pursue everything. Life is one long pursuit.”

“People who have seen me play live and read things I’ve written will already know that I’ve got a very eclectic taste.  But the average person will just think of “What A Difference A Day Makes”. I’ve never had a problem with that though.  Singing a song like that and doing it well is one of the hardest things you can do.”

“When you concentrate on making music, the whole point is that you never stop and are always trying to move on.”


I could go on, but this talent has cool covered.  You get a chance to catch him doing his thing, take it.  Support live music, or else… it’s time to cover up the keys.